the medicine of ceremony

don't think too much about it, just do it – it's in your blood

1. I did a ceremony last week for myself and the fires and though it was so intimate, I felt the need to share this moment and solidify it here.

As humans, ceremony is in our DNA. It is as intuitive as breathing and walking. It is as simple as:

Ceremony = (Altar) + (Being Present) + (Waving Hello to The Invisible) + (Saying Thank You) + (Welcoming All Physical Sensations) + (Giving Space For Our Prayers)

It is both a time for grief and celebration. Allow your tears to take on both qualities without restraint. I recommend letting your tears roll down our cheeks onto the items in front of you, anointing them.

2. I sat down for a moment looking at all of these precious things that I had on vacation with me and/or gathered over the past two weeks since the fire, having placed them down so casually into what became a perfect altar. It was the same motions you take when you are putting together a bouquet of flowers – oooo that looks nice, I need a little bit more height here, let’s fill that hole there. It was thrown together without much thought and couldn’t have been better, just like so many of the best things in life, like that outfit you scrounged up because everything else was dirty and it ended up being deeply chic, or the way you quickly piled your fruit after unpacking from the grocery store and it looked ready to become a famous still life painting.

Altars are physical spaces where “aspects of yourself are represented symbolically through objects” (thank you

DirectBluebird

for this nugget of wisdom). Each object becomes a physical extension of our soul. Small bits of ourself before us, looking back at us. (What do they see? What do they feel? We help them find the words in ceremony.)

Ceremony is multi-dimensional – we are bouncing between speaking to and for these sacred items, to ourselves, and to spirit. They all dance together. One leads you through a door to another and then back down a path and over a small bridge to the other and so on and so forth, until you’ve accidentally created this flowing dance between earth, soul, and ether. As it gets going, I imagine the dance swirling around my heart, gently holding it in its vortex, softly filling its cracks with iridescence, like the gold streaks in kintsugi-repaired pottery.

4. Ceremony is such medicine for the soul because you are taking the time to speak directly to it.

5. The silence was loud at first, so I started in whispers. And as those became more comfortable, I realize all of what I was saying deserved to be heard. So I restarted and spoke at a normal volume, so spirit could really hear me. And I said…

6.

To all of the endless love I have received:

The candle from a friend to ‘make wherever I am feel like home.’

The random rock I found in my bedroom of our family friend’s beautiful home that they so graciously and immediately opened us to us when we lost ours.

The card from Gravel and Gold, sent alongside a free pair of my favorite jeans that had burned, with a note that said ‘you will rise.’

The ‘lemon love’ bracelet that the sweet little girls handing out free lemonade in Brentwood gave me. I wish they knew how much I needed that act of kindness on my first Saturday back ‘home’ (but not really) and how much I cried driving away.

Fern, my new stuffed animal, who I found on Ebay and received with a sweet blue ribbon tied around her neck, presenting her as the beautiful gift that she is. She is the same exact brand and doggo style from 2001 that my 2 previous stuffed animal doggos were, only she’s as large as my bunny stuffed animal and therefore melds all of their essences into one cute lil fluff ball that is her. I realize I too might be her savior, for after being out of production for 20+ years and sitting in a box in someone’s garage in Florida, she has finally found her home with a new momma that believes Toy Story is a true story.

To the few items we were able to hold onto:

The salvaged chunk of tile from our roof and a nail. I never knew how they stayed on the roof, never really thought about it, until I saw them scattered around the front yard. So that’s how it worked. I will frame these in a shadow box one day, for it honors both the physical roof over our head that kept us safe for 20+ years and the invisible spirit of our home that we might not have seen but was always there, holding the magic together.

My three favorite rings, including a small ring I got in high school when I was accepted into my dream college, my college class ring (a pinky signet), and a silver thumb ring I was gifted at Christmas this past year––our last Christmas at home together.

The Palisades Village ticket that the family friend were were staying with eerily found in his car right when we moved in. A place I never once parked in because we were 2 blocks away, but still a forever memento from a time that is no more.

A random Kodak index page from 2000 that my dad cheekily hid in my suitcase when I went on a trip in November. Little did I know it would become precious, a memento of the pictures and videos that will now become the stories we tell.

To the journey that would split our lives in two:

Our flight tickets signifying when the Goldbergs left their home for the last time, and entered into the twilight zone, returning to a completely different reality from what they once knew. The ‘vacation’ that marked our Before and After.

To returning to myself again, slowly but surely:

The palo santo I found in the home we are staying in. Its smell reminding me of the early days of coming into my spirituality and now seeing just how far I have come––how no matter what life has thrown at me, I always end up unearthing another spring deep within.

The shell I picked up on my first beach walk when I still felt numb, like life was technically going on but it wasn’t really. Honoring this simple action that we all have had the urge to do since we were babies––collecting and holding onto objects that call to us and infusing them with special meaning, giving them a life they might not have had without your touch. Doing these little things that make you feel like you again, and that connect you to your inner child.

To the old and to the new:

The journal that I miraculously started the day I moved back into my childhood home and ended the day we visited what was left of our home. A synchronicity that elicited full body chills and sobs. One I could never have possibly planned for and one that made me feel so deeply held by spirit, despite it all.

My new journal that I christened on the Lunar New Year with this ceremony and these exact words.

To spirit that is still holding me through it all, even when I felt most betrayed:

My new druid animal oracle deck that is the blood relative of my previous plant druid oracle deck which burned, reminding me that while yes, we can often replace the things we had quite easily, it’s often good to pause and check in to see if they still fit our soul. Sometimes they no longer feel right and you grieve that. You accept that you were only meant to share that precious, short time together. And as you let go of them, remember, it is not a betrayal, it is growth.

The frog card that I pulled during this special evening. The frog is the companion of the rain spirits (!), bringing joy, delight and healing, reminding us that ‘nothing is what it appears to be,’ that ‘life is more fun than you at first supposed,’ and to ‘look for the beauty and the magic behind appearances.’

7. To all that we have lost, to all that we have received, and to all that we will gain. We honor it all in ceremony.

Love,

Kris xo

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The Artists’ Way – Together

February 18 – May 20, 2025 | Tuesdays at 5:30–7:00PM PT

It’s almost time––I’m hosting an Artist’s Way group starting this February and I would love for you to join me. 🎨 ✨

For context, The Artist’s Way: A Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity by Julia Cameron is an iconic book and 12-week, self-led course that helps you recover your creativity.

It can be both an incredibly empowering experience to reconnect with your creativity, and also a very tender one. That’s why I’m hosting an Artist’s Way group––so we can embark on this incredibly journey and move through all that comes up together. <3

We will…

1. Uncover pressure points that may be restricting your creative flow.

2. Learn new creative techniques to open up opportunities for growth and self-discovery.

3. Be in community with other like-minded souls, ready to support one another.

If this calls to you, check out this page with all the details + info on how to sign up! If you’re a LA fire victim, I have 2 free spots available and would love to gift you one so you can have this soul medicine. <3 Feel free to DM me or email me.

Sending my love to you. xo